Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
The English Patient fav movie line
Juliette Binoche:
"The heart is a fiery organ."
So tacky. So The English Patient.
"The heart is a fiery organ."
So tacky. So The English Patient.
Pretty Woman: fav movie lines
Richard Gere couldn't manage his friend's stick-shift Porche so he let Julia Roberts take over. Zooming through the Hollywood hills, she cheerily comments:
"This car corners like it's on rails."
Julia Roberts to Richard Gere when questioned about what she really wants:
"I want the fairy tale."
Julia and Richard were, ahem, negotiating:
Julia: I would have stayed for two thousand.
Richard: I would have paid four.
Their first encounter on the street if ya know what I mean:
Richard: What's your name?
Julia: What do you want it to be?
Julia: Can I call you Eddie?
Richard: Not if you expect me to answer.
"This car corners like it's on rails."
Julia Roberts to Richard Gere when questioned about what she really wants:
"I want the fairy tale."
Julia and Richard were, ahem, negotiating:
Julia: I would have stayed for two thousand.
Richard: I would have paid four.
Their first encounter on the street if ya know what I mean:
Richard: What's your name?
Julia: What do you want it to be?
Julia: Can I call you Eddie?
Richard: Not if you expect me to answer.
The English Patient killed me.
Let's put it this way. If, after three hours of watching a movie, you find yourself laughing hysterically while a lover holds his paramour in her death throws, then something went terribly wrong in said movie. Terribly wrong. Yeah, well, this was a terrible movie.
The whole, "I'm randomly attracted to a married person and I have to have them even though it will destroy my life, her life, and her husband's life" thing just doesn't tug at my heart strings. And Juliette Binoch's out-of-nowhere fling with the bomb detonator didn't really work for me, either. One moment, she doesn't give two straws about that guy, and the next thing you know she claims it's her destiny to marry him.
? (blink)
The "thesis" of the movie is a line from a poem, (oh please, let's not abuse poetry!), read by Juliette Binoche with particular relish: "the heart is a fiery organ."
Now, according to the producers of The English Patient, that means that people:
1) have no control over who they marry and thus are stuck in relationships they can never be happy in and therefore they must . . .
2) carry on affairs with others and claim to be perfectly happy with the dual arrangement, there are no complications at all until their spouse finds out, at which point they . . .
3) drive their spouse so insane that he foists them into a plane and they go flying across the desert in the attempt to smash into the offending Romeo so that they can all be dead together, but they . . .
4) fail miserably at this because they fail to smash into Romeo and only the angry husband dies, so the offending Juliette gets left in a cave, her lover runs to get help and fails miserably at this (incompetent moron) so she . . .
5) dies and then the offending Romeo hauls her into a plane and they crash. Ouch.
6) He dies from burn wounds and somehow this is all profoundly moving.
7) The end.
8) The wild eyed look in Colin Firth's eyes before he (almost) smashed into the offending Romeo was actually pretty good.
9) I burst out loud laughing when the offending Romeo finally died from his burn wounds. Looking at his face was like looking at a crazy-eyed, rotting peach.
Hilarious.
Okay, fans of The English Patient, defend this piece of sh*t.
And Mike Clark of USA Today steps up to the plate with his one line review:
"An aerobic workout for the tear ducts."
Poor, Mike. Poor, sorry, retarded Mike. Something tells me he wasn't being sarcastic :(
But he made me crack up again!
The English Patient, reviews, et al: so bad it's good.
The whole, "I'm randomly attracted to a married person and I have to have them even though it will destroy my life, her life, and her husband's life" thing just doesn't tug at my heart strings. And Juliette Binoch's out-of-nowhere fling with the bomb detonator didn't really work for me, either. One moment, she doesn't give two straws about that guy, and the next thing you know she claims it's her destiny to marry him.
? (blink)
The "thesis" of the movie is a line from a poem, (oh please, let's not abuse poetry!), read by Juliette Binoche with particular relish: "the heart is a fiery organ."
Now, according to the producers of The English Patient, that means that people:
1) have no control over who they marry and thus are stuck in relationships they can never be happy in and therefore they must . . .
2) carry on affairs with others and claim to be perfectly happy with the dual arrangement, there are no complications at all until their spouse finds out, at which point they . . .
3) drive their spouse so insane that he foists them into a plane and they go flying across the desert in the attempt to smash into the offending Romeo so that they can all be dead together, but they . . .
4) fail miserably at this because they fail to smash into Romeo and only the angry husband dies, so the offending Juliette gets left in a cave, her lover runs to get help and fails miserably at this (incompetent moron) so she . . .
5) dies and then the offending Romeo hauls her into a plane and they crash. Ouch.
6) He dies from burn wounds and somehow this is all profoundly moving.
7) The end.
8) The wild eyed look in Colin Firth's eyes before he (almost) smashed into the offending Romeo was actually pretty good.
9) I burst out loud laughing when the offending Romeo finally died from his burn wounds. Looking at his face was like looking at a crazy-eyed, rotting peach.
Hilarious.
Okay, fans of The English Patient, defend this piece of sh*t.
And Mike Clark of USA Today steps up to the plate with his one line review:
"An aerobic workout for the tear ducts."
Poor, Mike. Poor, sorry, retarded Mike. Something tells me he wasn't being sarcastic :(
But he made me crack up again!
The English Patient, reviews, et al: so bad it's good.
Monday, September 7, 2009
Do you know your pop culture?
I sure don't . . . but, before long, thanks to a Netflix and Rhapsody membership and the guidance offered by EW Pop Culture University, I'll finally be itk. Check it out:
http://www.ew.com/ew/package/0,,20284496,00.html
So excited. Maybe for once I'll have something to say at those darned holiday open houses.
http://www.ew.com/ew/package/0,,20284496,00.html
So excited. Maybe for once I'll have something to say at those darned holiday open houses.
Publish Post
Madonna, Tori Amos, and feminism: Like a Prayer, the missing link
Yep, that's right. I was listening to "Like a Prayer," and Madonna's fervent cooing on the verses sound a whole bunch like Tori Amos. And since Madonna came first, it would be more appropriate to say that Tori has been copying Madonna's style. Honestly, the similarity is striking.
Here's why that similarity is noteworthy.
Madonna is often criticized for being sleazy and sensational in the worst kind of show-biz way. In fact, to my father she is the devil incarnate. No joke. To discover a link between her and the more "principled" 90s feminist singer-songwriters that followed her proves a point about her music that I have always felt: it has a philosophy and it's about self-expression. Don't get me wrong, I'll admit Madonna has pushed buttons in her day just to get attention. But I think there's a lot more to it than that underlying her art.
What Madonna is being sexual, it's not in the Britney Spears-ish "I'm a slave 4 u" way. It's in the feminist-ish "I'm gonna be sexual if I wanna be sexual; sex is a choice I'm making and it's not about me pleasing some guy, it's about me getting some because I want some." Photo shoots like that of her infamous bridal dress pose prove that Madonna has been passionate about turning conventions on their heels and breaking down the cultural assumptions that women should behave and feel a certain way, be sexual in a certain way . . . i.e. in a sweet, chaste, naive sort of way. Now, I have no problem with women and being sweet and naive but where I part ways with those who can't stand Madonna is that I don't believe women should have to be sweet, chaste, and naive. Sleazy is never cool, but I don't necessarily equate sexuality with sleaze and I believe, as a matter of principle, that our concept of "woman" should be a wide umbrella encompassing a variety of personalities and lifestyles. I think that's what Madonna was getting after.
Does Madonna go to extremes that may be distasteful at times? Yes, she does. But that's what artists do. They can't be subtle. If they're subtle, they'll bore you and likely fail to communicate their point. The job of an artist is to shake things up, to take risks that are not allowed in any other forum. Go Madonna!
Now, back to the 90's singer-songwriter Tori Amos connection. Tori put out an autobiography a few years ago and talked about her conflicted relationship with sexuality. Apparently, she was raised Catholic or Southern Baptist or something and, basically, felt guilty about her sexual instincts. She describes herself being torn between the two biblical figures of the Virgin Mary and the prostitute Mary Magdalene. She came up with some new-ageish sounding solution to reconciling the two in her mind which I have since forgotten: I think it was just her fancy way of admitting that she ultimately sided with Mary Magdalene (without admitting it). Anyway, doesn't Madonna's music sound like something that would speak to Tori at, dare I say it, a deep level?
I always felt and liked the feminist agenda in Madonna's music and so does Tori, I know it.
I never wanna hear one more comment equating the mindless pop stars of the '00s with Madonna. I'm warning you, don't push me over the edge this time. Or it will start raining bloody tampons.
Here's why that similarity is noteworthy.
Madonna is often criticized for being sleazy and sensational in the worst kind of show-biz way. In fact, to my father she is the devil incarnate. No joke. To discover a link between her and the more "principled" 90s feminist singer-songwriters that followed her proves a point about her music that I have always felt: it has a philosophy and it's about self-expression. Don't get me wrong, I'll admit Madonna has pushed buttons in her day just to get attention. But I think there's a lot more to it than that underlying her art.
What Madonna is being sexual, it's not in the Britney Spears-ish "I'm a slave 4 u" way. It's in the feminist-ish "I'm gonna be sexual if I wanna be sexual; sex is a choice I'm making and it's not about me pleasing some guy, it's about me getting some because I want some." Photo shoots like that of her infamous bridal dress pose prove that Madonna has been passionate about turning conventions on their heels and breaking down the cultural assumptions that women should behave and feel a certain way, be sexual in a certain way . . . i.e. in a sweet, chaste, naive sort of way. Now, I have no problem with women and being sweet and naive but where I part ways with those who can't stand Madonna is that I don't believe women should have to be sweet, chaste, and naive. Sleazy is never cool, but I don't necessarily equate sexuality with sleaze and I believe, as a matter of principle, that our concept of "woman" should be a wide umbrella encompassing a variety of personalities and lifestyles. I think that's what Madonna was getting after.
Does Madonna go to extremes that may be distasteful at times? Yes, she does. But that's what artists do. They can't be subtle. If they're subtle, they'll bore you and likely fail to communicate their point. The job of an artist is to shake things up, to take risks that are not allowed in any other forum. Go Madonna!
Now, back to the 90's singer-songwriter Tori Amos connection. Tori put out an autobiography a few years ago and talked about her conflicted relationship with sexuality. Apparently, she was raised Catholic or Southern Baptist or something and, basically, felt guilty about her sexual instincts. She describes herself being torn between the two biblical figures of the Virgin Mary and the prostitute Mary Magdalene. She came up with some new-ageish sounding solution to reconciling the two in her mind which I have since forgotten: I think it was just her fancy way of admitting that she ultimately sided with Mary Magdalene (without admitting it). Anyway, doesn't Madonna's music sound like something that would speak to Tori at, dare I say it, a deep level?
I always felt and liked the feminist agenda in Madonna's music and so does Tori, I know it.
I never wanna hear one more comment equating the mindless pop stars of the '00s with Madonna. I'm warning you, don't push me over the edge this time. Or it will start raining bloody tampons.
Sunday, September 6, 2009
*As Good as It Gets*: the first movie I've ever favorited without knowing why
Wow, am I on a romantic comedy streak. Just finished As Good as it Gets and it's the first movie I've seen in a long time where I genuinely cared about the characters involved and had to put down my guitar to finish the movie and it all leaves me scratching my head wondering why. Jack Nicholson is such a curmudgeon while Helen Hunt sparkles . . . those two should never have ended up together and yet I found myself rooting for Jack in an odd way.
You know, the beauty of this movie is how three characters, Simon, Melvin, and Carol, overcome their differences and "issues" and find love and friendship. I guess that's why I liked it. Who doesn't like chicken-soup like that? Who doesn't love to see the impossible happen? Just makes you feel kinda warm and fuzzy. Check out this line from the end from crusty ol' Jack himself (to Helen):
"I might be the only person on the face of the earth that knows you're the greatest woman on earth. I might be the only one who appreciates how amazing you are in every single thing that you do. And how you are with Spencer. And then every single thought that you have and how you say what you mean and how you almost always mean something that's all about being straight and good. And I think most people miss that about you. And I watch them wondering how they can watch you bring their food and clear their tables and never get that they just met the greatest woman alive."
Wow.
The thing I liked about this movie is that it was too quirky and unpredictable to be "sappy." I mean that last line might sound kind of sappy if you hear it out of context, but I think most people who have seen the film would agree with me that the people involved and the things that happen to them are just too lop-sided and out-of-the-blue to make this movie pretty and cute. Instead, this movie is about imperfect people with imperfect lives who find the "inner beauty" in each other. I really like that because that is real love, in my opinion. Great relationships, be they romantic ones or friendships, are all about digging beneath the surface of things and appreciating the divinity in another human being. I suppose the message of this movie is that two people, no matter how how dysfunctional they may be or how different from one another they may be . . . two people--no matter what--can bond when they they discover and value the divinity in each other.
And now I know why I liked that movie.
You know, the beauty of this movie is how three characters, Simon, Melvin, and Carol, overcome their differences and "issues" and find love and friendship. I guess that's why I liked it. Who doesn't like chicken-soup like that? Who doesn't love to see the impossible happen? Just makes you feel kinda warm and fuzzy. Check out this line from the end from crusty ol' Jack himself (to Helen):
"I might be the only person on the face of the earth that knows you're the greatest woman on earth. I might be the only one who appreciates how amazing you are in every single thing that you do. And how you are with Spencer. And then every single thought that you have and how you say what you mean and how you almost always mean something that's all about being straight and good. And I think most people miss that about you. And I watch them wondering how they can watch you bring their food and clear their tables and never get that they just met the greatest woman alive."
Wow.
The thing I liked about this movie is that it was too quirky and unpredictable to be "sappy." I mean that last line might sound kind of sappy if you hear it out of context, but I think most people who have seen the film would agree with me that the people involved and the things that happen to them are just too lop-sided and out-of-the-blue to make this movie pretty and cute. Instead, this movie is about imperfect people with imperfect lives who find the "inner beauty" in each other. I really like that because that is real love, in my opinion. Great relationships, be they romantic ones or friendships, are all about digging beneath the surface of things and appreciating the divinity in another human being. I suppose the message of this movie is that two people, no matter how how dysfunctional they may be or how different from one another they may be . . . two people--no matter what--can bond when they they discover and value the divinity in each other.
And now I know why I liked that movie.
